i'm drunk, i love you
Nov. 14th, 2021 11:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
paglambingfandom: the boyz
pairing: juyeon/younghoon
rating: gen
word count: 636
other tags: vague uni AU, angst, unrequited love, moving on (sort of), jubbang are close friends, based on the movie i'm drunk, i love you aka i stole scenes and put deobz in them
A/N: i know, i know, i said i'm allergic to angst BUT i listened to burnout by 3D on a whim yesterday and i was like hmmm what if i write something based on idily... i wanted to write for a ship i wouldn't normally write for so here it is! :,) it's not my best work but i like it nonetheless, and i hope you do too!
♥︎
Juyeon plugs the aux cord into Younghoon’s old (but still perfectly functional) iPod classic. Younghoon grins at him from the driver’s seat and Juyeon tries to not read into it. It doesn’t—shouldn’t—mean anything. They’re just friends. They’re just friends parked outside a gasoline station restroom waiting for Chanhee to come out so they can continue driving.
They’re just friends, Juyeon tells himself as he grips the iPod a little tighter. Younghoon looks at him, expectant. Right. He has to ask the magical, all-seeing iPod a question. It’s how their tradition works.
“What,” Juyeon says, pausing for effect. “is waiting for me in the field of love?” He circles his thumb around the wheel without looking and presses play.
“Ohhh,” Younghoon teases, on the brink of laughter as a song about being heartbroken sounds through the car speakers. Juyeon laughs it off but the smile Younghoon gives him tells him he isn’t being convincing.
“It’s okay,” Younghoon says. “It’s just a game.”
Juyeon smiles back. It is just a game, even though it doesn’t feel that way. Younghoon takes the iPod from him and begins to ask his question but Chanhee knocks loudly on the car’s backseat window. Younghoon unlocks the doors and Chanhee slides in, launching into a complaint about how gasoline station bathroom stalls never fully close.
-
“Time check,” Chanhee says. “You’re still hoping.”
Juyeon takes a long swig of beer before setting his bottle down with a thud. Chanhee levels him with a look. It’s equal parts disappointment and pity, but Juyeon cannot find it in him to be angry anymore. He sighs.
“Six years,” Juyeon says. “Six years, Chanhee. I even followed him to college. And now we’re here,” he looks around at all the people seated in wooden picnic tables like they are, laughing and drinking and kicking up sand and probably not heartbroken the way Juyeon is right now. “We’re here because he wanted to meet with his ex.”
“Six years,” Chanhee echoes. “And you still want to keep going?”
Juyeon says nothing and gets up to buy another beer.
-
The singer on stage is crooning about a former lover, reminiscing about how they used to be and how sorry they feel that the time they spent has passed. Younghoon moves closer and Juyeon hopes he doesn’t open his mouth.
“I’m sorry,” Younghoon says softly, because of course he does. And of course he is. Juyeon can’t blame him for this one. Younghoon is gentle and caring and Juyeon loves him.
Juyeon opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. What is he even going to say? It’s fine that Younghoon doesn’t feel the same way? That six years doesn’t hold a flame to someone you got to know so intimately in a short span of time and that he understands? It’s not fine and Younghoon knows that. There isn’t any use convincing him.
“Don’t say sorry,” is what Juyeon settles on. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” He sighs and looks down at his beer, still filled up to the neck. “It’s not your fault you don’t love me back, okay?”
He doesn’t look at Younghoon but he knows Younghoon wants to say something in an attempt to smooth things over. But it doesn’t matter at this point. This is Juyeon’s wound to heal. Nothing from Younghoon is going to fix it, no matter how much he wants to.
“Let’s go?” Changmin says, appearing at Younghoon’s side and offering Juyeon a wide smile. Juyeon nods and starts walking to the direction of their car, where Chanhee is waiting for them.
On stage, the performer has moved to the next song on their setlist. It’s enough that you’re here, they sing. Please take care of my heart. Juyeon walks away from it all and decides that maybe six years is enough.
pairing: juyeon/younghoon
rating: gen
word count: 636
other tags: vague uni AU, angst, unrequited love, moving on (sort of), jubbang are close friends, based on the movie i'm drunk, i love you aka i stole scenes and put deobz in them
A/N: i know, i know, i said i'm allergic to angst BUT i listened to burnout by 3D on a whim yesterday and i was like hmmm what if i write something based on idily... i wanted to write for a ship i wouldn't normally write for so here it is! :,) it's not my best work but i like it nonetheless, and i hope you do too!
Juyeon plugs the aux cord into Younghoon’s old (but still perfectly functional) iPod classic. Younghoon grins at him from the driver’s seat and Juyeon tries to not read into it. It doesn’t—shouldn’t—mean anything. They’re just friends. They’re just friends parked outside a gasoline station restroom waiting for Chanhee to come out so they can continue driving.
They’re just friends, Juyeon tells himself as he grips the iPod a little tighter. Younghoon looks at him, expectant. Right. He has to ask the magical, all-seeing iPod a question. It’s how their tradition works.
“What,” Juyeon says, pausing for effect. “is waiting for me in the field of love?” He circles his thumb around the wheel without looking and presses play.
“Ohhh,” Younghoon teases, on the brink of laughter as a song about being heartbroken sounds through the car speakers. Juyeon laughs it off but the smile Younghoon gives him tells him he isn’t being convincing.
“It’s okay,” Younghoon says. “It’s just a game.”
Juyeon smiles back. It is just a game, even though it doesn’t feel that way. Younghoon takes the iPod from him and begins to ask his question but Chanhee knocks loudly on the car’s backseat window. Younghoon unlocks the doors and Chanhee slides in, launching into a complaint about how gasoline station bathroom stalls never fully close.
“Time check,” Chanhee says. “You’re still hoping.”
Juyeon takes a long swig of beer before setting his bottle down with a thud. Chanhee levels him with a look. It’s equal parts disappointment and pity, but Juyeon cannot find it in him to be angry anymore. He sighs.
“Six years,” Juyeon says. “Six years, Chanhee. I even followed him to college. And now we’re here,” he looks around at all the people seated in wooden picnic tables like they are, laughing and drinking and kicking up sand and probably not heartbroken the way Juyeon is right now. “We’re here because he wanted to meet with his ex.”
“Six years,” Chanhee echoes. “And you still want to keep going?”
Juyeon says nothing and gets up to buy another beer.
The singer on stage is crooning about a former lover, reminiscing about how they used to be and how sorry they feel that the time they spent has passed. Younghoon moves closer and Juyeon hopes he doesn’t open his mouth.
“I’m sorry,” Younghoon says softly, because of course he does. And of course he is. Juyeon can’t blame him for this one. Younghoon is gentle and caring and Juyeon loves him.
Juyeon opens his mouth to speak but nothing comes out. What is he even going to say? It’s fine that Younghoon doesn’t feel the same way? That six years doesn’t hold a flame to someone you got to know so intimately in a short span of time and that he understands? It’s not fine and Younghoon knows that. There isn’t any use convincing him.
“Don’t say sorry,” is what Juyeon settles on. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” He sighs and looks down at his beer, still filled up to the neck. “It’s not your fault you don’t love me back, okay?”
He doesn’t look at Younghoon but he knows Younghoon wants to say something in an attempt to smooth things over. But it doesn’t matter at this point. This is Juyeon’s wound to heal. Nothing from Younghoon is going to fix it, no matter how much he wants to.
“Let’s go?” Changmin says, appearing at Younghoon’s side and offering Juyeon a wide smile. Juyeon nods and starts walking to the direction of their car, where Chanhee is waiting for them.
On stage, the performer has moved to the next song on their setlist. It’s enough that you’re here, they sing. Please take care of my heart. Juyeon walks away from it all and decides that maybe six years is enough.
